Strength in Numbers

So, is there really strength in numbers or is it really just happy speak for codependency?

I'm finding myself really struggling with the whole weight loss thing. I've been disillusioned with weight loss this summer. I think it's mostly been that I've been so stressed and crazy busy that I haven't had one moment to think about counting Points and I refused to beat myself up about not working out as much. Summer in itself has been a workout.

I'm making excuses, though, and I hate that. In fact, it starts a self-destructive cycle of guilt and self-loathing that just doesn't end. So, I'm going to stop that right now and get on with it.

I'm thinking about going to attend Weight Watchers Meetings with a girlfriend. It is more expensive, which has held me back in the past, but it also forces you to be more accountable, so probably worth every penny. And maybe that's just what I need. It's hard, though, because it feels like admitting defeat to me. Well, just a bit. Maybe it's good to admit that you can't do everything on your own?

I have a feeling that making weigh in and meeting a social outing would be fun, as long as we just didn't get caught up in post weigh-in coffee breaks at the Scandinavian bakery!

I'm just in the thinking stages of this, but I'm leaning towards doing it. I've stalled out, plateaued or whatever the Weight loss word of the week is for becoming stuck in mud or was it Texas sheet cake? No, no, that's not fair. I've just ignored the scale and still tried to be relatively healthy, aside from a week of diving into a donut bag that happened on vacation.

This year is all about getting myself back. For the first time since becoming a mom, I'm starting to see Me again.

Feeling Waffley?

There are those days, more than I'd like to admit, that it takes every ounce of my being to work out. I've tried to run my work out schedule like a work week. I work out five days a week, Monday through Friday. Saturday and Sunday, I try to get some extra activity in if I can, but more often than not, they're my look-forward-to-rest-time-that-motivates-me-to-stick-with-the-work-out-schedule-that-I-set-knowing-that-I-wouldn't-stick-with-it-if-I-had-to-do-it-seven-days-a-week.

Truth time. I haven't worked out since before our vacation. I'm not going to make excuses. No one cares. I don't really care. The point is, you just get back on the horse and ride, right?

I figured out that if I had to drive to the gym or if I didn't get my workout clothes on right when I was just getting out of bed, bleary eyed, and easily led, that I wouldn't do it. That's why I work out at home. My alarm goes off or the kid alarm sounds, as in Young One comes in announcing something like, "I spilled an entire box of oatmeal on the floor this morning, but don't worry, I cleaned it up and put it all back in the carton. And, oh, I forgot, today is the day I need red shoelaces and a box of spinach pasta for an art project at school." I grab my yoga pants and awesome REI athletic top that I got for four bucks ($4!!!!), put on my industrial strength exercise bra (thank you Oprah) and by the time I'm getting my socks on, I've done too much to undo. Once dressed, I might as well work out, right?

I'm sure once I get bored with all this and want to head to our community center, which has a fantastic pool and gym, I'll have cuter work out clothing and a better attitude. Maybe not, though. For now, it's Leslie Sansone Walk Away the Pounds. I'll do anywhere from 3-5 miles, with resistance training after I get Young One on the bus. And I'm done. This works for me. The key is just to get moving, right? I don't have trouble with the moving, just getting to the point where I start moving. That's always been my challenge.

You feel so good after working out, you'd think that would be more of a motivator. But, I could think of any number of excuses why I shouldn't. They're pretty funny and at some point, I should write them down.

Merriam Webster (http://www.m-w.com/ remember real dictionaries?) defines to waffle as flip-flopping or vacillating. I have another definition. In my book, to waffle is to eat crisp breakfast confections, pulled from a piping iron, and drizzled with real maple syrup hopefully with French pressed coffee and a Sunday paper on the side.

I came up with this recipe, inspired by the gals over at Mennonite Girls Can Cook. I've gained 3 pounds just reading their recipes! Such talented cooks. I've been able to successfully convert many of their recipes to Weight Watchers without a problem. Their pictures, stories, and recipes have inspired me to create many of my own and for that, I am very grateful.

Here's my version of Waffled French Toast. I don't think we'll ever eat it any other way!

Waffled French Toast

Each 2 ounce slice, lightly dipped in egg custard, is approximately 4 Weight Watchers Points.

One loaf of Kings Hawaiian Bread
1 cup egg substitute or egg whites
1 cup skim milk
1 tsp vanilla
1/2 tsp cinnamon
real maple syrup--no substitute

Preheat waffle iron. Slice Hawaiian bread into 2 ounce slices. Mix egg, milk, vanilla, and cinnamon in a shallow dish. Spray waffle iron with nonstick spray. Dip bread into custard, flipping quickly and allow bread to drip excess back into dish. Place on waffle iron, close, and allow to cook until steam stops and bread is cooked through and browned. Serve with fruit and drizzle one tablespoon of real maple syrup over it.

Vitamin Water is a Rip Off

Those expensive bottles of so called Vitamin Water are a rip off. Yes, I like their convenience, but they're just as environmentally damaging as regular bottled water. (Even if you are a fanatic about recycling, some of them slip through to the landfills). Yes, they taste good. Yes, they have vitamins and minerals and are made with fruits that sound exotic and enticingly delicious.

But, you can make them yourself for much much cheaper. Simply splash 100%, no sugar added juice into your ice water. Yep, it's as simple as that.

And you've got a delicious, extremely low calorie, "Vitamin Water" without the guilt about purchasing the plastic and without the expense.

Make sure your juice is 100% and that there is no added sugar, high-fructose corn syrup, or other additives. Avoid artificial sweeteners like the plague (I think they're the source of all sorts of problems). I love to use cranberry juice.

This makes getting in all those extra glasses of water, required by Weight Watchers, much easier for me.

"You Have to Make Yourself a Priority"

"Putting yourself back on your to do list."

These quotes are from Oprah. The Great One.

Her weight gains and losses have all been in the public eye. I've talked about how much I feel for her because of this, but that's not what I'm going to write about today.

Today, I want to talk about how so many of us have taken ourselves off our to do list. It's so true. And I don't think Oprah is enlightening or earth shattering in making this declaration. I did it. I did it for almost ten years.

I gave and gave and gave and self-sacrificed to the point that my well went dry. Oprah said that she is happiest when she is giving to others. That's me. Totally. And about 2 years ago I started to get really crabby and resentful and pissed off at the takers in my life. And a year and a half ago, I put myself back on my to do list and joined Weight Watchers.

I'm no longer resentful for giving of myself because I'm not doing it to the point of being self-sacrificing. I'm back on my list and I'm not taking myself off again.

I'm writing this on January 5th, the day that Oprah discussed her weight gain, scheduling this to post when I'm on vacation. So, it's probably old news. It's probably been blogged about endlessly. That's OK. It's still relevant now. In fact, it will always be relevant.

If you're reading this, I challenge you to put yourself on your list. Take a little time each day to take care of your body, your mind, and your spirit. You are worth it.

Find your bliss. Find your self. You can.

Soup in a Hurry

Taco Soup

Serves 6 at 4 Weight Watchers Points per Serving

1 (15 ounce) can whole kernel
corn, drained
2 (14.5 ounce) cans chicken
broth
1 (10 ounce) can chunk chicken--I use cooked, chopped chicken breasts
1 (15 ounce) can black beans
1 (10 ounce) can diced tomatoes with green chiles, drained

Open the cans of corn, chicken broth, chunk chicken, black beans, and diced tomatoes with green chilies. Pour everything into a large saucepan or stock pot. Simmer over medium heat until chicken is heated through.

Top with baked tortilla chips and fat free sour cream, but be sure to include any toppings as additional Points.

Black Bean Brownies?

This recipe makes the rounds at Weight Watchers Meetings and online on the message boards. I've avoided it because I just can't get around the fact that there are beans in the brownies. I'm all for pumpkin in my chocolate cake and zucchini squash in my muffins, but this one was a tough sell for me.

Little did I know they would be so delicious. Low in WW Points because the beans are so high in fiber, you won't notice there are legumes in your dessert.

Black Bean Brownies

1 can (15oz)black beans
1 box (16 oz) plain brownie mix
2 egg whites

Process black beans in food processor till smooth. Add to dry brownie mix with egg whites and stir till mixed. Bake in 9 x 13 pan sprayed with PAM. Bake at 350 for 15-18 min. minutes or as directed on the brownie box.

The Housewife--Stretch a Buck Homemade Chicken Broth

Watching your pennies and your waistline? You've got to make your own chicken broth! You can freeze it in ice cube trays or larger containers. I like to use the ice cube trays that I've picked up in the free boxes at garage sales. That way, I can pop out a few cubes to add to cooking veggies. You won't believe how great they taste with this little addition!

I use chicken broth to cook wild or white rice in. I use it to start soup on a busy day. Cook potatoes in it or add to potatoes as you're mashing them and they taste great without additional fat.

Always a cheapskate, I have a hard time purchasing something that I can so easily make on my own. After we have roast chicken, I always make soup or broth from the carcass. If I don't have time that week, I'll throw the leftovers in the freezer for another time. The spices you've used to roast the bird taste great in the broth!

You can make broth in the crock pot too, which is great if you have to be away during the day.

Chicken or Turkey Broth

One chicken or turkey carcass
2 bay leaves
one chopped onion
garlic--lots or little, you decide
3 carrots, peeled and roughly chopped
several stocks of celery cleaned and roughly chopped
water to cover

In a large stockpot or crock pot add all ingredients. Cover and simmer on low on the stove top several hours or on low in your crock pot for 8 hours. Strain and refrigerate until fat rises to the top--or use a gravy separator to remove fat. Label and freeze. If you're placing in ice cube trays, freeze until solid and then store cubes in zip bags.

I've Had My Fill

We had a delightful Christmas, filled with just enough of the family to feel loved and happy, but not enough to make us tear our hair out. Know what I mean?

I ate too much, though. Too much of everything. I didn't mean to. Nope, that's not quite true. I did mean to. About a week ago, I had decided that to hell with counting Points and holding myself back. Christmas comes just once a year and all that nasty rationalization that we do when we overindulge.

I'm finally feeling, after five days of too much rich food, that I just can't do it anymore. I can't face one more reheated plate of Christmas leftovers and I couldn't put one more cookie in my mouth if I forced it in with both hands.

Eating like that makes me feel like crap. I can't imagine how people can eat like this every day. Did I overindulge like this all the time before I had my light bulb moment of starting a new life? Not to this extent, I'm sure.

There's a guy, I can't remember his name, but he was featured in Morgan Spurlock's Super Size Me documentary about McDonalds, who eats at least two Big Macs every day. He was recently featured on Yahoo News, why I don't know. Perhaps it's all the New Years Resolutions that are soon to be made. Anyway, I remember that any time I've ever had the craving for McDonald's Big Macs (and those times have been very few in my lifetime--we honestly rarely, if ever, eat fast food), I've always ended up regretting it. As in, clutching my stomach, moaning, and cursing the very existence of McDonalds. And drinking a bottle of Mylanta.

So, I wonder, these people who eat fast food several times a week, do they feel like I do right now all the time? I can't imagine.

So, it's time to get back on track. I'm tempted to throw away the rest of the leftovers, but the cheapskate in me can't do that. I guess I'll put them in the freezer. The cookies will disappear, I'm not interested any more. And when they're almost gone, I'll trash the rest of them. Why oh why I ever made homemade caramels is beyond me? The very thought of them nauseates me.

This feeling has got to be why New Years Resolutions are made. I just know it.

Bluck.

I OD'd on Gravy

We had a delightful Thanksgiving. My brother hosted and it was so delicious, BUT we love our own leftovers, so I ended up making the dinner for our little family on Friday. OK, so we love the idea of our own leftovers until we spend three days eating turkey! I made our meal as Weight Watchers friendly as I could and turkey IS one of the most weight loss friendly foods there is, but, I still OD'd on gravy. I'm sure there are healthier versions of gravy out there, but I only know how to make it as my Grandma taught me--with the pan drippings. Oh well, 'tis the season and I refuse to miss out.

We at turkey almost all weekend. Young One still took sandwiches for lunch today. He could probably eat it every day, he just loves it so much. I'm done, though.

I worked out hard this am (penance?) and am getting back on track. Hence, this tried and true mac and cheese for dinner. I'm looking forward to vegetables (Campbells Green Bean Casserole cannot be considered a vegetable). I'm looking forward to salad. I'm looking forward to a meal that doesn't put me in a turkey induced coma after consuming it. I'm not looking forward to my weigh in on Friday. I skipped last week. I know, I know, not healthy, I should have just faced it, but quite honestly, in all the craziness of taking care of my mom, I forgot!

Still busy taking care of my mom, so this quick recipe fits right in with my day. I hope you enjoy!

Back on Track Mac

Makes 8 servings at 5 WW Points per serving. My version is probably even lower since I use high fiber, Ronzoni macaroni. Young One hates the breadcrumbs on top, so I try to leave a portion uncovered. The breadcrumbs do help keep the macaroni from drying out on top.

12 oz uncooked Ronzoni macaroni, elbow-type
1/2 cup(s) fat-free sour cream
12 oz fat-free evaporated milk
8 oz low-fat cheddar or colby cheese, shredded
1 tbsp Dijon mustard
1/4 tsp table salt
1/4 tsp black pepper
1/8 tsp ground nutmeg
2 tbsp dried bread crumbs
2 tbsp grated Parmesan cheese

Preheat oven to 350ºF.
Cook pasta according to package directions without added fat or salt; drain and transfer to a large bowl. While pasta is still hot, stir in sour cream; set aside.
Heat milk in a small saucepan over medium heat until tiny bubbles appear just around the edges (known as scalding). Reduce heat to low, add cheese and simmer until cheese melts, stirring constantly with a wire whisk, about 2 minutes; remove from heat and stir in mustard, salt, pepper and nutmeg.
Add cheese mixture to pasta; mix well. Transfer to a 3-quart casserole dish.
Combine bread crumbs and Parmesan cheese; sprinkle over pasta.
Bake until top is golden, about 30 minutes. Yields about 1 cup per serving.

Where Am I?

It's Wednesday morning at 7:30, well not really. I'm scheduling this to post then.

Right at that moment, I will be waiting with my mom before they take her into surgery. She's having a knee replacement. I will have been up since 4 am and probably pretty groggy and most likely damning myself for ever quitting caffeine. Mom will be nervous, but putting on a good front for the nurses. She will have told them I'm a nurse and that she's a nurse, which I hate. They treat you differently then. When it comes to me and my own family, I like to be treated just like everyone else. Dumb it down for me, speak slowly, treat me like I'm an idiot. Because as stressed out as I usually am in those situations, I don't want to use my brain. I just want someone to do it for me!

Mom has been putting this surgery off for a while, so this day is a long time coming. Watching my mom struggle with a weight related issue was one of the reasons I woke up and started doing something about my own situation. Look at your mom and you'll see part, if not all, of your future. I don't want a knee replacement. I don't want weight related pains and aches, and immobility. I don't want any of it.

Who knows what damage my fat years have already done? That's in the past, though. And I'm marching on.

If you have a minute, say a prayer for my mom. She's scared and probably hurting and could use all the positive energy you can send along. Thanks. I'll be busy taking care of her for the next few days.

You are Worth All This

I think I sometimes forget my own value. It's easy to do when you're a mom. Everyone's needs come before yours. I think it's even stronger with us fat chicks.

I was looking through some old pictures the other day and was shocked when I came across a picture of myself at my heaviest (see above). I was feeling pretty cute that day, having a good time with my guys, skipping rocks into Lake Superior. We were taking lots of pictures, usually something that I used to hide from. There I am, with a big smile on my face, enjoying the day. And I was having fun. But, at the time, I didn't feel worth very much.

Here's the deal. I had just begun to realize that a person who was very near and dear to me wasn't the person I thought she was. I felt betrayed, lied to, and used up. I don't think we talk very much about what it feels like when we as women have toxic friendships and what it feels like when they end. This person, who I felt a sisterhood with, stole from me. She stole money. She stole trust. She lied to me. Worst of all, she hurt my son.

I look back on it now and realize that because of this, I completely stopped caring about myself. I packed on a few more pounds and was at the heaviest point of my life. The hurt was so raw that I can vividly remember this very day filled with joy as being one of the first after so much pain. I think it was that day that I began to care again.

Every day, when I get up, slog into my workout clothes and begin to face another day of eating and living healthfully, it feels like a new beginning. No matter what happened the day before. No matter what happened in my past, it's all new again. It's a great place to be in.

I am happier than I've been in a long time. My life is going so well. I don't have any major stress. I'm finding myself again. I've realized that this person wasn't the sum of my life. That she has her own issues, many she has no clue are even happening because she's so busy tearing through life trying to keep it together. I don't envy her one bit.

I have a wonderful marriage. I'm taking incredible care of myself. I am enjoying my life, my family, my home, my friends. I feel like I have worth again. I'll always keep this picture as a reminder of where I was and where my new life began. (I'm so glad I'm not that big anymore. I'm not where I want to be yet, but that's behind me anyway!)

Seems like a weighty subject (pun intended), but I think a lot about gaining weight has nothing to do with your food intake. Oh, that's the solution, yes, eat less, but I'm speaking about bigger things. I think there is a part of us fat chicks that stops caring about ourselves and when we do again, it's such a wonderful feeling.

I'm pretty sure that losing your worth isn't just relegated to those of us with weight issues. I'm sure it happens to lots of people in lots of situations. We just wear our worthlessness as a big, uncomfortable suit for all to see.

Slow? You Have No Idea

Losing weight, for me, has felt like unzipping layers. Inch by inch, uncovering the outside me revealing the inside me. Sometimes, though, it's hard to deal with the slowness of weight loss. I love seeing my body change, but it's excruciatingly, painstakingly S.L.O.W..............

We live in a fast world. Information, schedules, people all move at a very fast pace. People never do just one thing at a time. Multitasking has become the name of the game. Ever see those people reading and talking on their cell phones while driving? Pretty insane, right? The rate of weight loss is understandably frustrating, but I think it's even worse when the pace of the world is so crazy.

We've all heard, it took a long time to put it on, so it's going to take a long time to take it off. It's a bit trite, but it's true.

For me, it doesn't matter how long this takes. Really, it doesn't. I'm going to live healthily. I am going to work out at least five days a week. I am going to make healthy choices over bad ones, forever. I won't deprive myself, but I'm going to live in balance.

Just writing that is a comfort to me. It's my mantra. It is my truth.

Research shows that people who lose weight slowly have a better success rate at maintaining their goal weight. It also means less need for tummy tucks or other surgical procedures to take care of the skin that's lost all it's supporting fat too quickly to keep up. I remember when my doctor shared with me the secret to getting your skin to shrink with you-- losing slowly--and I realized, that was the only way for me.

I never want to go through the big loss again and I'm saying that still being in the midst of it. I know that I will live the journey forever. That's okay with me. No, it's more than that. It's fantastic. I made the connection over a year ago and it feels so good to be where I'm at. The future can only be better.

Honesty

It struck me this morning how easy it would be to not be honest in a food journal. You know what a food journal is, right? It's where if you bite it, you write it. A food journal can be kept for any number of reasons. Health care providers love to ask you to do them to help source out possible allergens or to monitor diabetes or cholesterol control. Food journaling is the foundation of Weight Watchers.

Let me tell you, those first few weeks of journaling for Weight Watchers were awful for me. I hated it, but it was eye opening. At that time, I was trying to just eat what I usually did within the Weight Watchers plan. It was instantly apparent that I had to cut soda out of my life as I could have easily consumed most of my Points just by drinking Dr. Pepper alone. I don't use artificial sweeteners, so, I just cut it cold turkey. No diet soda for me. I've heard the carbonation is just as bad for you as the sugar or artificial crap in it anyway.

I was hungry all the time then. I couldn't figure out why. I was eating, sensibly, I thought. Turns out, I just wasn't eating sensibly enough.

Seeing your diet right there in black and white is so helpful in trying to figure out how to combat hunger and where all your calories are going. It's easy then to see where you can streamline things.

I'm still a paying member of Weight Watchers, mostly because I love the online food journaling. It's so easy and there's a handy dandy recipe builder thingie that will figure out the Points values of your favorite recipes. The rest of Weight Watchers really doesn't interest me. I don't like the meetings. I don't like to weigh anywhere, but the privacy of my own bathroom. And I don't like the sales pitches, "Get this WW pedometer for only two payments of $19.95". All of that was what kept me away from this program in the past. Thank God for the online option.

Getting back to honesty. I think honesty is at the core of the successful weight loss journey. You must honestly look at how you eat. You must honestly look at how much you move in a day. I wish that I would have journaled for about a week before I started, just to have that as something to look back on. I think the honesty of what I was actually eating pre-WW would floor me.

The Darndest Things-- "My mom takes pictures of our food. Weird, huh?"

One of Young One's friends was over. He asked, "What do moms do all day, anyway?" "I don't know," Young One said, "My mom takes pictures of food. Weird, huh?" I won't tell you what his friend responded with. It had something to do with laundering underwear, but it came out in the kid translation of a possible mom rant. Pretty funny stuff and I definitely have to tease his mom about it.

Yes, I take pictures of food, occasionally. I also am the family photographer. I'm rarely in pictures because of it. I'm definitely working on handing over the camera so that it actually appears that I did attend family events and vacations.

Food photography is really hard. Real food isn't really pretty. Our appetites are visually stimulated and some food photography out there just doesn't do it for me. Heck, some of mine doesn't do it for me. I love to try, though.

When I owned my food business, I once spent six hours with a film team filming what was to be less than four seconds of our television commercial. Yes, six hours for four seconds. It involved pasta, and steam, and oil glazed vegetables. The things we did to make that four seconds of film actually look delicious would turn your stomach. No, the dish was not edible when we were done.

That filming experience is in the top ten of the most challenging things I did for our business. I remember feeling like a wet noodle myself from all the hot steamy water. The photographers made it much easier than it could have been and their vision led to a great commercial.

So, yep, I sometimes take pictures of food. My shots are usually pretty quick. I take a bunch, change the lighting, backgrounds, etc and hope for a good one to pick from. I will never be a food stylist. One of our old neighbors was and I'll never forget how she told me they varnished the turkeys for the holiday cookbooks (yuck!). I have fun with it and hope that maybe I can provide some representation of something I'm cooking up.

This food blogging is a pretty funny hobby when you think about it. Maybe the kid's got it right.

Pretty Ugly Chicken Patties

Serves 5 at 5 WW Points each.

1 pound uncooked boneless, skinless chicken breast
1 1/2 cup fat-free skim milk
3 tbsp onion
1/4 tsp cayenne pepper, to taste

1 cup Panko crumbs

Cut chicken into cubes. Place in food processor with milk, onion, and cayenne pepper. Pulse until coarsely ground. Set aside. Place breadcrumbs onto a plate. Season with salt and pepper if you wish. Preheat a nonstick pan that has been sprayed with nonstick cooking spray over medium heat. Spray your hands with a little nonstick spray. Form ground chicken into 5 patties. Dip both sides into bread crumbs and place in pan. Cook about 5-7 minutes per side or until juices run clear and patties reach a temp of 180 degrees inside.

I serve these on buns with chopped roasted red peppers, lettuce, and spicy mayonnaise. Or top a salad. Or serve like chicken parmigiana with pasta and bottled sauce. They're very versatile and, although pretty ugly, they taste great!

CHOCOLATE!

Chocolate Fudge Cake

My mom and I are the best of friends. Most evenings, if she's online, we instant message each other. I sure wish we would have had this technology when I lived so far from home! Email, messaging, Internet phone, video conferencing--none of that was possible. We relied on long distance phone calls, mostly paid for by mom and dad--they'd initiate the calls. We certainly didn't have the budget to afford many calls! Our visits were as frequent as we could afford. I still remember feeling like my heart got pulled out every time we had to separate again.

(On a side note, we've been talking to Young One about pre-Internet life and what the early Internet was like. We've never seen such a look of horror on his face. Imagine, not getting the answer to something within minutes! GASP!!)

My mom made everything from scratch. Whether she worked, or was at home with us, she always made a homemade dinner. In the evenings, if a chocolate craving struck her, she's sometimes whip up a batch of fudge. I can still remember how that made our house smell. It was so delicious--even though she insisted on walnuts in her fudge (a flavoring that took me years to begin to love). Fudge is a definitely a rare treat, now. I had a few bites at a candy store when we headed to the North Shore this summer, but it wasn't as good as mom's.

Getting in your chocolate fix really isn't that hard on Weight Watchers. In fact, if you search just for chocolate on WW website you'll get hundreds of recipes.

This chocolate cake is one of my favorites. It's rich and moist, and can be made just in minutes. It's just as wonderful as any non-WW recipe. In fact, I'd make it if I was a Skinny Chick. Young One and his friends just love it. They have no idea they're getting a vegetable (sort of) in it!

Chocolate Fudge Cake
Serves 24 at 2 WW Points per serving. I think it's closer to 12 servings (4 Points a piece).

1 package dry mix chocolate cake
2 cup canned pumpkin, 1 can
1/2 CAN water

Preheat oven per mix directions. Mix all together with electric mixer set on low. Turn on high and let it beat for about 2 minutes, or until fluffy and well blended. Place in your favorite pan, I like to use a 9x13 inch or a Bundt pan (prepare pan as directed on mix package). Bake according to box directions.

Doesn't need frosting. You may serve with Cool Whip Free or sprinkle with powdered sugar and fresh raspberries.

Happy Weight Watchers Anniversary To Me

Well, it's been a year on Weight Watchers and I'm still hanging in there. I'm very proud of myself. I figured that if I stuck with it for a year, that completely changing my lifestyle could actually happen.

So, here I am.

Big pat on back.

A year ago today, I couldn't do a lot of things that I can do now. I'm not going to get into specifics. It's really not necessary. The fact is that just making these positive changes in my life and doing them day in and day out, despite some bumps in the road, is worth celebrating.

A year ago, I thought that I would be much closer to my goal weight than I am. Now, I know that goal was unrealistic. A year ago, I was very scared. I didn't want to fail again. Somewhere, somehow, during this year, I had a shift of mind and it became a new life.

A year ago, I was embarrassed to talk about my weight. In fact, a year ago, I was so disgusted with myself that I couldn't reach out to a soul. I wrote this blog for myself and only about 4 months ago, did I decide that I felt strong enough to connect with other people online. Those of you that I've met, I am eternally grateful for your wisdom and friendship.

A year ago, I was hungry all the time and then I learned how to effectively fuel my body. I ached from the challenge of starting to work out. A year ago, I could only do about 20 minutes of cardio and I could only lift one pound weights.

A year ago, I shed some takers from my life.

A year ago, I was so angry with myself for getting so lost and so overwhelmed and overextended with caring and giving to other people that I forgot to take care of ME. A year ago, it suddenly occurred to me that if I don't take care of ME, then I can't take care of anyone else.

Never again.

A year from now I may look back on today as having some unrealistic goals. I may regret some things and be celebrating others. But, a year from now, I will still be doing what I will for the rest of my life. I will be marching forward, slogging along if I have to. I will not give up.

A Peek Into the Scientific--Are you a Super Taster?

Very interesting (insert hand rubbing and mad scientist laugh here), I'm one of 1/4 of all humans. I'm a SuperTaster! Now, before I get all excited and buy some tights and a cape, let me give kudos to Elastic Waist for getting me clued in to this phenomena. Actually, I'm both a Super Taster and a Non Taster, which basically says I'm a middle of the road taster. Well, this is based on a simple quiz that you can find at Waist's blog or by clicking here.



I guess you can take a test to find out what you are, but I'm just not dying to have scientific proof of my taste status. This is really interesting. I would bet my iPod that my son is a Super Taster. I'm so proud! No, actually, he has very strong taste preferences and can't handle anything overly spicy. Biting into a raw onion will throw him over the edge. Perhaps it's just as I've thought in the past--that he just is young and still HAS all his taste buds.



Anyway, I wanted to share this study. Quite interesting. Thanks BBC!

So, Maybe I Really am Successful at this Weight Loss Thing

I'm on Cloud 9. Have you ever thought about that strange phrase? I mean, why isn't it Cloud 9 or Cloud 10? Hmmm, I'll have to Google that. It probably has to do with the number of times a guy called a girl before she said yes to a date. Or the number of times a dog barked at midnight. Or someones locker number. Or their shoe size.

Anyway, I went to the doctor the other day and I'm still celebrating my visit with him. He said that I'm right on as far as weight loss for the time I've been on this journey. He said no more than 4 pounds a month. Between 2 and 4 pounds a month and I will keep it off. Any more than that and odds are, I won't be successful in the long run.

He told me that he was proud of me. And I took to that comment like a kindergartener on their first day of school.

I've been discouraged from time to time and keep reminding myself that it's not about that scale number, but in many ways it is. As many sizes as I've dropped, I still occasionally beat myself up about that damn number. As good as I feel, not getting winded going up one, two, three, even ten flights of stairs--but that number, THAT NUMBER can sometimes bring me to tears. Not long, wailing, woe is me tears, but just a smarting, passing, drop or two. Enough just to piss me off and resolve never to do it again and then I do. That number, though, is what we measure our success by, it's what we update our friends with, it often blinks repeatedly in neon in my mind.

So, basking in the words of my doctor, maybe I am getting this right. Slow and steady definitely does win the race and I just had somebody with MD next to his name state that as a true medical fact. It feels great. So what if I may not reach my goal for X number of weeks (and we all know we do that math equation periodically. If I've lost this much weight in this many weeks, how many weeks will it take me to get to goal?) Maybe I'm actually doing this right!

I'm Obsessed with Gwyneth's Exercise Routine

I feel like Gwyneth let the cat out of the bag when she visited with Oprah last week. I mean, I knew in my heart of hearts that she wasn't JUST naturally gifted with that body, but a part of me wanted to believe that she came to it by NOT working at it. Turns out, she's got to work just as hard as the rest of us. Perhaps harder, since she's scrutinized so closely and has to have her picture taken on the red carpet--most certainly with her arm raised tempting flappy arm jiggles that are the curse of all women.

I'm sitting here with a back injury, having survived a very painful weekend of recovery. I'm missing my workout, but I know I'd be crazy to try in my shape. So, instead, I'm sitting here, obsessing about Paltrow's workouts. Six days a week, in an 80 degree room, she is tortured by a pint-sized blond, about half her height, for two hours. Now, granted, her body is her job, her saleable goods, if you will. She has to do this or she'd lose out on her livelihood. Flashing back, I can still see those two blondes sweating it out and looking absolutely gorgeous, with their glistening faces stripped of all makeup.

Me, I'm not a pretty exerciser. I'm quite sure my face oddly grimaces during exercise and I have been known to try to punch the TV screen as my mistress of pain taunts me to do just 100 more hamstring curls. I don't think I will ever be beautiful while working out. It's just not in me. I don't want to go to a gym. I want my workout time to be solely for me and every time I hit our community center, I end up chatting with so many people that I don't focus on the real reason I should be there. I'm content to wear my ugly workout clothes, almost worn through yoga pants, have un-brushed teeth and bed messed hair and hit my basement "gym". (Well, it's really my laundry room and I've been known to do aerobics while adding bleach to my whites as they tumble clean. And I did once get motion sickness while watching my front load washer while doing lunges.)

Gwyneth, why did you have to share this with us? I mean, yes, I guess I can identify with you a bit more, but, a part of me still wants to hate just that little part of you. The gorgeous part that glows while doing cardio. I know you can't help it that you come from such a gorgeous gene pool. Next time, could you curse or burp or something?

Keep on, keepin' on.

Blue Plate Special

My mom hated hot tuna. She wouldn't make tuna noodle casserole, so I was a young, newlywed with twenty seven bucks in my checking account and a few days until pay day before I tried it.

I'm not a fan of any of the Helper, pre-fab casserole mixes that seem to take up a great deal of our grocery aisles. Tuna Helper almost frightens me. For the price of one of those boxes, you can make several, healthier casseroles without all the added processed food. Personally, I don't think it's good to eat food that you can't pronounce, so I avoid these boxes like the plague. I'm certain that one day, they'll figure out that many of the diseases that affect our world come from a combination of those food chemicals.

My checkbook isn't in jeopardy, but I still love to save a buck, so I try to stretch the food budget as far as I can. This recipe is a lightened version of the classic Tuna Noodle Casserole. It's delicious, inexpensive, and relatively good for you. I like to serve it with a big tossed salad and some steamed veggies.

Tuna Noodle Casserole

Serves 8, 1 cup servings at 6 WW Points per serving

12 oz uncooked egg noodles--Ronzoni makes this even lighter than the Points I've stated above, I like to use their macaroni or broken spaghetti
12 oz water-packed tuna fish, drained
2 cup button mushrooms, sliced
1 cup frozen green peas, thawed
16 oz fat-free sour cream
1/2 cup fat-free mayonnaise
2 tsp Dijon mustard
2 tsp parsley, fresh, chopped
1/2 tsp table salt, or more to taste
1/4 tsp black pepper, or more to taste
1/2 cup shredded reduced-fat Monterey Jack cheese, or reduced-fat Swiss cheese

Preheat oven to 350ºF. Cook noodles according to package directions without added fat or salt; drain and transfer to a large bowl. Fold in tuna, mushrooms and peas.
Whisk sour cream, mayonnaise, mustard, parsley, salt and pepper together in a separate bowl; fold into noodle mixture. Transfer to a 4-quart casserole dish; top with cheese. Bake until top is golden and bubbly, about 30 minutes. Yields about 1 cup per serving.

If you have lots of leftover vegetables, make sure they're well drained and add them in. They do not affect the Points value.